Do you remember the movie about Joan Crawford’s life, Mommy Dearest? This is what uncontrolled anger does to people. For those of us looking in, we can see the damage it causes; but for the person experiencing it, it creates a blind rage that prevents them from seeing the bigger picture.
Think about a time when you were infuriated, when you felt your blood boiling through your veins. Then think about the following morning. Did you regret anything you said? What impact did your rage have on the rest of your day? Did it make your children feel safe and loved?
When a marriage has run its course, emotions run high. The slightest comment can provoke tempers to flare. We can’t keep our actions fully in perspective because, when we’re hurting emotionally, it can feel like our world is falling apart. Reason often goes out the window, and it’s easy to want to retaliate or assume a defensive stance.
Keeping Your Children As Your Main Priority
No matter how your soon-to-be ex-spouse has treated you, you must always keep in mind how this chapter will affect your children. A lot of what happens during childhood shapes us for the rest of our lives. It can create or heighten insecurities, affect how we engage in relationships with others, how we view life, and even the careers we choose.
If your divorce is inevitable, your primary priority should be ensuring that the transition is as smooth as possible for your kids. There are specific things parents can do to achieve this, depending on each child’s age. You can explore options other than the traditional court battle. A collaborative divorce brings to the table legal, financial, and emotional support; all focused on protecting each spouse’s interests and in avoiding a contentious process.
When it comes to looking out for your children’s welfare, don’t let your ego get in the way of your purpose. Eventually, your divorce will be finalized. Acrimony shouldn’t be what your children remember about it for the rest of their lives.