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divorce collateral damage

Collateral Damage

When I married my husband, he had already been married once before to someone else . . . and divorced. Early on, I remember him preparing me to go with him to his semi-annual martial arts training and the test that would accompany it, all the while explaining to me the festive gathering of old…

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Embrace Change - The Collaborative Process

Embrace Change

Collaborative divorce offers families the opportunity to work with a team of professionals to negotiate a resolution that meets the highest goals and interests of the entire family. The only constant in life is that there will always be change. Good times will transform into not-so-good times. Bad times will get better. Life is a…

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Who is an Effective Collaborative Attorney?

Who is an effective collaborative attorney? An effective collaborative attorney is confident in her ability to practice law; she has an appropriate amount of experience in her practice area, in this case in the dissolution of marriages. As with any other practice method or area, it is crucial for your attorney to be skilled in…

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dive in to the collaborative process

Don’t Be a Pelican!

Collaborative Divorce isn’t just a process; it’s a vocation. I recently escaped for ten days to the Virgin Islands to take a breath, to re-examine my role in the collaborative process, and to assess whether I am doing all that I can to move the process into the mainstream. Ten days without shoes, without my…

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initial conversations in the collaborative process

The Collaborative Process: Initial Conversations Between Co-Collaborative Counsel and Choosing Neutrals

As soon as both clients have chosen their collaborative process attorneys, if you have not yet, reach out to your co-collaborative counsel (that would be “opposing counsel” in a litigated case) and introduce yourself. You should begin discussing who might be appropriate team members in light of the issues involved in the divorce at hand…

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divorce crisis md

Divorce Crisis

There is nothing like a crisis to bring families, even split ones, together. After a divorce with children, you must remember that, to those kids, you are still just one family. This year, Hurricane Irma took a path that threatened my community. As a result, my ex-husband and I were faced with our first emergency…

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note taking collaborative divorce meeting

Note Taking – First Collaborative Divorce Team Meeting (MD)

I was recently invited to be part of a collaborative divorce team as the notetaker. Here’s what I learned: I have become familiar with the collaborative divorce process over the last few months, discussing how the process unfolds with clients and our lawyers and working with clients as we prepared them for their meetings, but…

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A Vital Conversation: Keeping Financial Issues and Divorce at Bay.

One of the leading reasons why couples seek marriage counseling and ultimately divorce is because of financial issues, including disagreements as to how to handle debt and differing spending habits. Financial issues are a huge source of stress for so many. Contrasting spending styles, or simply not having enough money to go around each month,…

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what is the opposite of happiness

What’s the Opposite of Happiness?

I read recently that the opposite of love is not hate; it’s indifference. So, what is the opposite of happiness? I asked this question because, in all of our collaborative divorces, we strive to enable our clients to set goals, those targets that they believe will lead to their future happiness, if not immediately, then…

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when financial stress leads to divorce

When Financial Stress Leads to Divorce

Financial problems are one of the leading causes of divorce. Spouses often disagree as to how much they should spend, how much they should save, and how they should handle financial emergencies. Let’s elaborate on the challenges of divorce from the financial perspective. Do you pinch your pennies while your spouse makes it rain wherever…

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